You should normally avoid too much personal language (“I”, “my” etc), although opinions on this vary. As a rule of thumb, only use it when you are describing what you actually did and when you are expressing personal opinions, probably in your conclusion. Don’t refer to yourself as “we” unless you are describing some sort of groupwork, and don’t refer to yourself as “the author”: it’s pompous and confusing.
9. Make sure your proposal has a comprehensive review of the literature included. Now this idea, at first thought, may not seem to make sense. I have heard many students tell me that "This is only the proposal. I'll do a complete literature search for the dissertation. I don't want to waste the time now." But, this is the time to do it. The rationale behind the literature review consists of an argument with two lines of analysis: 1) this research is needed, and 2) the methodology I have chosen is most appropriate for the question that is being asked. Now, why would you want to wait? Now is the time to get informed and to learn from others who have preceded you! If you wait until you are writing the dissertation it is too late. You've got to do it some time so you might as well get on with it and do it now. Plus, you will probably want to add to the literature review when you're writing the final dissertation. ( Thanks to a website visitor from Mobile, Alabama who helped to clarify this point. )
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thesis late 14c., "unaccented syllable or note," from L. thesis "unaccented syllable in poetry," later "stressed part of a metrical foot," from Gk. thesis "a proposition," also "downbeat" (in music), originally "a setting down or placing," from root of tithenai "to place, put, set," from PIE base *dhe- "to put, to do" (see factitious). Sense in logic of "a proposition, statement to be proved" is first recorded 1570s; that of "dissertation written by a candidate for a university degree" is from 1650s.
I think this is a winning idea for several reasons! First of all, I’m really intrigued by the idea of flipping the writing instruction so that students are doing more of their writing practice in the classroom where the support is available. I would imagine that this would lead to less student frustration and that students are finding themselves better equipped to tackle the roadblocks that occur during writing. I like the fact that this activity asks students to work collaboratively to create thesis statements and build off of each other’s ideas. Also, I really like the fact that the teacher models editing and thinking out loud. This is a great way to show students what you mean, rather than just telling them. Finally, making this activity fun with music and good-natured competition will most likely make for more engaged students. Love the fact that this idea can be adaptable to other mini writing lessons. Thanks for the great idea!